Pete's Baseball Quotes

Managers and Managing

Casey Stengel:
The secret of managing is to keep the guys who hate you away from the guys who are undecided.

Earl Weaver (quoted by Thomas Boswell):
"I learned my biggest lesson in managing in the first day of Class D," says Weaver, fifty-one, sitting in the Baltimore Orioles dugout, a cigarette cupped inside his hand like a schoolboy not wanting to get caught. "You've got a hundred more young kids than you have a place for on your club. Every one of 'em has had a goin' away party. They been given the shaving kit and the fifty dollars. They kissed everbody and said, 'See you in the majors in two years.' You see these poor kids who shouldn't even be there in the first place. You write on the report card '4-4-4 and out.' That's the lowest rating in everything. Then you call 'em in and say, 'It's the consensus among us that we're going to let you go back home.' "Some of 'em cry. Some get mad. But none of 'em will leave until you answer 'em one question: 'Skipper, what do you think?' And you gotta look every one of those kids in the eye and kick their dreams in the ass and say, 'Kid, there's no way you can make my ballclub.' "If you say it mean enough, maybe they do themselves a favor and don't waste years learning what you can see in a day. They don't have what it takes to make the majors. Just like I never had it."

Darrell Johnson, Seattle Mariner manager, on when to change pitchers:
You just listen to the ball and bat come together. They make an awful noise.

Casey Stengel, after a reporter asked him if his team had choked in the World Series:
Ya see, I said "fuck" to ruin his audio. Then when I started scratching my ass I was ruining his video. He ain't gonna ask me a question like that again.

Casey Stengel:
Whenever I decided to release a guy, I always had his room searched first for a gun. You couldn't take any chances with some of them birds.

John Wathan, upon being named Kansas City Royals manager:
When I asked, "How would you like to be married to a major league manager?" my wife said, "What, is Tommy Lasorda getting a divorce?"

Yogi Berra, asked if he had new plans for the World Series:
It ain't like football. You can't make up no trick plays.

Tommy Lasorda:
Managing is like holding a dove in your hand. Squeeze to hard and you kill it; not hard enough and it flies away.
(ho 30)

Branch Rickey, on Leo Durocher:
He had the ability of taking a bad situation and making it immediately worse.

Dick Young, on Leo Durocher:
You and Durocher are on a raft. A wave comes and knocks him into the ocean. You dive in and save his life. A shark comes and takes your leg. Next day, you and Leo start out even.

Matt Keough:
Playing for Billy Martin is like being married to him. Right now, we're all sleeping on the couch.

Ron Guidry:
If you approach Billy Martin right, he's Okay. I avoid him altogether.

Matt Keough, on a game between teams managed by Billy Martin and Earl Weaver:
It's like you came to a controversy and a ball game breaks out.

Lee MacPhail, former American League President, recounting a meeting with Earl Weaver, whom he subsequently suspended for three days for abusing umpires:
Earl gave me his version of what happened and asked me not to suspend the umpires.

Bill James, on Maury Wills:
Letting him manage in the major leagues is like sending Bo Derek through cellblock A without a bodyguard.

Darrell Johnson, Seattle Mariners manager, on knowing when to change pitchers:
You just listen to the ball and bat come together. They make an awful noise.

Ralph Houk, in 1969:
What the hell are cops doing on the field? I've never seen cops on the field before. They ought to be back at the university where they belong.

Dave Bristol, manager of the Giants:
There'll be two buses leaving the hotel for the park tomorrow. The two o'clock bus will be for those of you who need a little extra work. The empty bus will be leaving at five o'clock.

Gene Mauch, Phillies manager, on how to handle Richie Allen:
Play him, fine him, and play him again.

Ernie Harwell, on Sparky Anderson:
Sparky's the only guy I know who's written more books than he's read. (Seattle Times 12/29/98)

Pete's Baseball Quotes